An open letter to real men


Men, you are not under attack. The issue here is that women have been and that was “just the way it was.”

Far too often, “boys will be boys” has meant that “girls” have been abused.

Calling out sexual harassment and worse does not make women men-haters. I can’t speak for every woman, but I love you guys. I am married to a good man and call other really good ones friends, brothers, cousins, coworkers, uncles, neighbors and fellow human beings.

RELATED: Dayton women share their own #MeToo stories

Sparked by the Harvey Weinstein sexual harassment scandal, actress Alyssa Milano encouraged women to share their experiences with sexual harassment and assault.

Since then, #MeToo has become a battle cry that all too many women seem to know intimately.

It is a cry against injustice, but it is not a cry against men.

‘Me too’: Alyssa Milano calls on women to share sexual assault, harassment experiences

The good ones, you husbands, fathers, brothers, cousins, coworkers, friends and fellow human beings, should be crying out against the bad ones just as loud.

With most things, there is a backlash with the #MeToo movement that has turned a spotlight on politicians, newscasters, actors and all the nameless men mentioned in Facebook and Twitter posts. The backlash goes something like this:

Why would she wait so long to say something?

I just don’t believe so-and-so would do that.

Why would she put herself in that situation?

Some woman can come out and accuse me of doing something .

Like you and like most journalists, I believe in due process and I believe in facts. Just saying something doesn’t make it true.

I also believe in comforting the afflicted and afflicting the comfortable.

I also know that women often do not and did not feel empowered to report sexual harassment and assault out of fear of the following backlash:

Why would she wait so long to say something?

I just don’t believe so-and-so would do that.

Why would she put herself in that situation?

Some woman can come out and accuse me of doing something .

The backlash perpetuates the sickness that we have sweated out of our pores for decades after decade after decades after decades.

Real men, take a step back.

Calling out sexual harassment and assault does not indict you.

It indicts the evil that some men have done and nearly every women at some level has endured.

You shouldn’t be offended.

You shouldn’t feel maligned.

You should be appalled that this is a reality that your wives, mothers, sisters, cousins, coworkers, friends and fellow human beings know all to well.

RELATED: What Hollywood’s men are saying about Harvey Weinstein amid sexual harassment allegations



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