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Latest from D.L. Stewart

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D.L. STEWART: Posh places for pampered pooches

4:00 AM Saturday, Jul. 29, 2017

When we had our Yorkie I always felt a bit self-conscious – OK, silly – about how we pampered him. Leaving the television tuned to Animal Planet when we went out for the evening. Cutting his food into little pieces. Letting him sleep in our bed, even though I never understood how an eight-pound dog could take up two-thirds of...
D.L. STEWART: Older folks may answer the TV remote when the phone rings, but at least we can add

4:00 AM Saturday, Jul. 22, 2017

People of a younger generation can, and do, poke fun at their elders’ fumbling attempts to cope with modern technology. I do it all the time, although that’s getting a lot harder, because I don’t have as many elders as I used to. When you need an easy laugh, you can’t go wrong joking about mom trying to Skype or grandpa...
Today’s heroic movies raise lots of super questions
 First off, I don’t understand why people call him “Spidey.” They don’t call Superman “Supey.” Or Batman “Batty.” And yet just about everybody, up to and including a headline in The New York Times about the latest Spider-Man movie, referred to the adolescent superhero as “Spidey.&rdquo...

11:03 AM Monday, Jul. 17, 2017

First off, I don’t understand why people call him “Spidey.” They don’t call Superman “Supey.” Or Batman “Batty.” And yet just about everybody, up to and including a headline in The New York Times about the latest Spider-Man movie, referred to the adolescent superhero as “Spidey.&rdquo...
D.L. STEWART: Taking over the world, one drone at a time

4:00 AM Saturday, Jul. 01, 2017

We have survived attempts to take over the world by everyone from Nazis to commies to yuppies. But do we still have enough fortitude left to outlast Jeff Bezos? When Bezos recently announced plans to buy Whole Foods for $13.7 billion, or whatever he happened to have in his pocket at the time, my stepson declared it was all part of a plot...
D.L. Stewart web exclusive: Politics shouldn’t happen to a dog
 The American political picture just keeps getting uglier. A mock-up of a severed head of the president of the United States displayed by a comedian. A Donald Trump look-alike slain, Julius Caesar-style, in an updated Shakespeare play. An aging pop singer suggesting the White House should be blown up. And now, comparing political figures to...

7:22 PM Monday, Jun. 26, 2017

The American political picture just keeps getting uglier. A mock-up of a severed head of the president of the United States displayed by a comedian. A Donald Trump look-alike slain, Julius Caesar-style, in an updated Shakespeare play. An aging pop singer suggesting the White House should be blown up. And now, comparing political figures to...
D.L. STEWART: Cavs’ LeBron James stars both on and off the court
 If you’re going to pick a sports hero for your children to admire, it’s best to do it carefully. For years after I met him I talked about what a cool guy O.J. Simpson was; I can’t do that anymore. A former sportswriting colleague once wrote about a famous pro football player, calling him “my kind of guy.” His...

4:00 AM Saturday, Jun. 17, 2017

If you’re going to pick a sports hero for your children to admire, it’s best to do it carefully. For years after I met him I talked about what a cool guy O.J. Simpson was; I can’t do that anymore. A former sportswriting colleague once wrote about a famous pro football player, calling him “my kind of guy.” His...
D.L. STEWART: Museum aims for success with failures
 Encouraged by Erma Bombeck, several years ago I produced a calendar based on columns I had written featuring my stepcat. Erma assured me it would be an easy money-maker. And why not? Lots of people love felines, which is just about the only explanation why “Cats” lasted all those years on Broadway and refused to just curl up and...

4:00 AM Saturday, Jun. 10, 2017

Encouraged by Erma Bombeck, several years ago I produced a calendar based on columns I had written featuring my stepcat. Erma assured me it would be an easy money-maker. And why not? Lots of people love felines, which is just about the only explanation why “Cats” lasted all those years on Broadway and refused to just curl up and...
D.L. STEWART: Trying to picture a painting that’s worth $110.5 million
 As someone whose taste in paintings begins and ends with dogs playing poker, I couldn’t be less qualified to comment on the latest big news in the art world. Still, I’m entitled to my opinion, as ill-informed as it may be. So my comment on the sale last week of a painting for $110.5 million is: “Wait … WHAT?&rdquo...

4:00 AM Saturday, Jun. 03, 2017

As someone whose taste in paintings begins and ends with dogs playing poker, I couldn’t be less qualified to comment on the latest big news in the art world. Still, I’m entitled to my opinion, as ill-informed as it may be. So my comment on the sale last week of a painting for $110.5 million is: “Wait … WHAT?&rdquo...
D.L. Stewart: In search of some understanding

4:00 AM Saturday, May. 27, 2017

An open letter to ISIS and Al Qaeda: Once again an act of terror has snuffed out innocent lives. And, once again, I don’t understand. What is it that groups like yours want? What are your goals? And what do they have to do with blowing up adolescent girls at a concert in England? I’ve done some research in an attempt to understand...
D.L. STEWART: Some schools serve kids a tray full of shame

4:00 AM Saturday, May. 20, 2017

With all due respect to baseball, America’s national pastime these days seems to be “shaming.” There’s body shaming and slut shaming, single shaming and animal shaming. A front page box on last weekend’s edition of USA Today even referred to “Mom shaming,” citing the 78 percent of Millennial moms...
President Kim Kardashian? You can bet on it
 If you missed the Kentucky Derby, don’t know enough about basketball to wager on the NBA playoffs and wouldn’t waste two bucks betting on the Cleveland Browns winning more than one game next season, here’s another option: You still can bet on whether Donald Trump will convert to Islam. The odds against that are 50-1, according...

4:00 AM Saturday, May. 13, 2017

If you missed the Kentucky Derby, don’t know enough about basketball to wager on the NBA playoffs and wouldn’t waste two bucks betting on the Cleveland Browns winning more than one game next season, here’s another option: You still can bet on whether Donald Trump will convert to Islam. The odds against that are 50-1, according...
Accordionist’s death squeezes out musical memories
 Despite the earnest efforts of my mother, I never learned to play a musical instrument. When I was in elementary school, she had me take piano lessons. After just six months, I had mastered “Hot Cross Buns.” But the lessons ended when the teacher determined I was physically incapable of playing with more than one finger at a time...

4:00 AM Saturday, May. 06, 2017

Despite the earnest efforts of my mother, I never learned to play a musical instrument. When I was in elementary school, she had me take piano lessons. After just six months, I had mastered “Hot Cross Buns.” But the lessons ended when the teacher determined I was physically incapable of playing with more than one finger at a time...
African-American Museum is worth waiting for
 WASHINGTON — It’s a project frequently referred to as “100 years in the making.” But if your travel plans include a visit to the National Museum of African American History and Culture, be prepared to wait a while longer. The next tickets become available online May 3 at 9 a.m. — for admission in August. Since...

1:12 AM Wednesday, May. 03, 2017

WASHINGTON — It’s a project frequently referred to as “100 years in the making.” But if your travel plans include a visit to the National Museum of African American History and Culture, be prepared to wait a while longer. The next tickets become available online May 3 at 9 a.m. — for admission in August. Since...
D.L. STEWART: Enjoying Major League Baseball by the numbers

4:00 AM Saturday, Apr. 22, 2017

In the latest example of fascinating Major League Baseball statistics, studies show that a 29-year-old centerfielder saves an average of four fewer runs per season than a 28-year-old centerfielder, The New York Times reported this week. While you may wonder why a prestigious newspaper would use valuable space to report stuff like that, baseball...
D.L. STEWART: Just ‘plane’ carried away at the doctor’s office

4:00 AM Saturday, Apr. 15, 2017

Last week, I was experiencing some chest pains, so I called my doctor to schedule an appointment. Normally I wouldn’t worry about stuff like that, but it’s probably better to be safe than sorry now that I’m approaching middle age. As it turned out, my doctor was out of town and wouldn’t be back for a week. But his...
D.L. STEWART: Restaurants’ rules on kids provide food for thought

4:00 AM Saturday, Apr. 08, 2017

In a highly competitive industry, a restaurant in North Carolina boosted its business by turning away customers. After numerous complaints at the restaurant in Mooresville when parents refused to turn down the volume of their daughter’s iPad, the family was asked to leave. Now Caruso’s no longer welcomes diners under the age of...
D.L. STEWART: Finding time for TV can be a taxing problem

4:00 AM Saturday, Apr. 01, 2017

Now that he’s handled that health care thing, President Trump can turn his attention to reforming taxes. I wish him well. But I’ve wished that same well for every president since LBJ, and it hasn’t seemed to do much good. In 1969, when Lyndon Johnson was president, the U.S. tax code was 16,500 pages long and there were three...
D.L. Stewart: Sometimes you gotta’ root for Goliath
 As the story about United Airlines v. three young girls first unfolded, it had all the makings of a major public relations disaster. The company would have received more support if it had announced that all its flights from now on would be preceded by a three-hour wait on the tarmac. In case you missed the story — and the internet storm...

6:09 PM Monday, Mar. 27, 2017

As the story about United Airlines v. three young girls first unfolded, it had all the makings of a major public relations disaster. The company would have received more support if it had announced that all its flights from now on would be preceded by a three-hour wait on the tarmac. In case you missed the story — and the internet storm...
D.L. Stewart: A non-review of ‘Beauty and the Beast’
 Due to a number of factors, I’m not a movie critic. One factor is that I have a hearing loss, making it difficult to evaluate technical stuff, such as dialogue. Another is that apparently I don’t know the difference between great movies and mediocre ones. Take “Citizen Kane,” which virtually every critic agrees is...

4:00 AM Saturday, Mar. 25, 2017

Due to a number of factors, I’m not a movie critic. One factor is that I have a hearing loss, making it difficult to evaluate technical stuff, such as dialogue. Another is that apparently I don’t know the difference between great movies and mediocre ones. Take “Citizen Kane,” which virtually every critic agrees is...
D.L. Stewart: On not being Jimmy Breslin
 In 42 years of columns, I never thought to write about a grave digger. Maybe I should’ve. Because writing about the man who dug John F. Kennedy’s grave was cited as prime example of what made New York newspaper columnist Jimmy Breslin great. “(Clifton) Pollard is forty-two,” the 1963 piece began. “He is a slim...

6:07 PM Tuesday, Mar. 21, 2017

In 42 years of columns, I never thought to write about a grave digger. Maybe I should’ve. Because writing about the man who dug John F. Kennedy’s grave was cited as prime example of what made New York newspaper columnist Jimmy Breslin great. “(Clifton) Pollard is forty-two,” the 1963 piece began. “He is a slim...
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